Sunday, December 04, 2005

A Puzzle

It might be cheap. It might be pricy. Sometimes it is worth of nothing, though sometimes it may mean more than the whole world. It may hurt, it may devastate and at the same time it may restore you from ashes. It the night it gets you heaven-high, in the morning it throws you to the very hell-depth. It makes you feel strong enough to claim that even God is nonentity and afterwards it makes you kneel and crawl in front of burning please-forgive-me –My Lord church candle. It turns you into an emperor and treats you as a slave. It has one hand of yours write the moral code and another to break it. It places a sharp sword into the right hand and stabs you with a blunt dagger of the left hand. It puts a poisonous snake on your chest and leaves an antidote close enough but makes sure you will never reach it. It urges you jump with a torn parachute, ride with a cut stirrup, drive with the broken breaks. It tempts you to walk along the edge of the cliff at a foggy night, to dance on the leaking bottom of your life boat, to grimace at your own funeral, to pass the narrow dark streets which lead to the dead-end of a subconscious. It cuts your veins, it spills all your blood and fills you with fire instead, dooming you to the constant craving of icy-cold relationships to ease your pain. It penetrates your essence and places its spies which will report you any time you will try to bottle up its manifestations. It clones you, it captures your uniqueness but gives you a renewed and upgraded version of your soul. It lets you into the greatest knowledge but deprives you of ability to think. It puts the words of salvation prayers into your mouth and then seals it up. It shows you the way out and cuts out your eyes. It sells you the ticket to the train which is about to dart off into the abyss, though lets you swallow the ticket to paradise. All that is done to test you, ‘cause it longs to see what you are worth of and how much you can endure to get hire, how much you can suffer to get purer, how much blooding scars you are ready to lacerate. Try as you may to escape, you wont – for it never fails. Once it got you, it will never set you free. Because it IS.


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